all this time.

yesterday i was asked what my least favorite part of the wedding planning has been.

i didn't even have to think.

easily, hands down...

the guest list & seating plan. we're not even done the seating plan but i already hate it. it's extremely satisfying when a group fits perfectly into one table, but let me tell you... those are few and far between. once we have our final final numbers submitted, it might make it easier. so we just did the pretend one to see how easy or hard it'll be, and will go from there. as for the guest list... it was painful for me. literally painful. slowly removing people from the list hurt so much. i love people. i have long lasting attachments to them that they don't even know about. so to remove them from a list of people i wanted to have at an exciting day, really stank. that said, we did the best we could and just had to acknowledge the boundaries within which we were working (aka $$).

i get my dress today.

i have never been one to dream up my dress or wedding. i'd thought about it, sure, but never really sat down to imagine the perfect _________ or the perfect __________. so when i went to my fitting on monday, i really didn't have much that i expected. not in a bad way. just i didn't know how to expect in that context.

so, i go with my mom & my sister. i'm off to a great start as i slam my elbow into the car door (only minor bruising, don't worry). but after that, i put it on and (insert angelic high pitched vibrato singing here) it was perfect!!!!! i mean, there were minor changes, but the dress fit so perfectly, everything about it is just wonderful. jill, the wonderful woman who made my dress, is truly an incredible and talented maker of epic clothing. that should probably be her title on her card, if she had a card.

so now, we are 18 days from the wedding (insert a holy crap here). i'm really excited. especially after the dress. it made it so real to me! details are being taken care of, though on occasion i have been losing a bit of sleep as i think up thing i could be forgetting and give myself anxiety. unfortunately, with or without wedding anxiety i seem to be doomed to having a lack of sleep. hopefully this little bit of kind of insomnia goes away soon. i have a (almost) sister in law to see, marathon relay to run, an apartment to pack up, a move to do, and last minute things to take care of, and oh, let's not forget... I GET TO GET MARRIED!