Fifteen.

Stories that explain who I am a bit

Part 2

Once upon a time I went on CMU's Outtatown program (Guatemala site).  

There was one particular evening when I was feeling just rotten about myself.  I was dealing with some of my darkest points of depression while on the program, and this evening would likely constitute as one of the lowest.  While everyone else was at a worship service in another building of the camp we were staying in, I was in the dining hall alone, writing a list of everything I hated about myself.  And it was long.

What a way to spend an evening.

But I was interrupted by our speakers son, who was probably about 11, asking me where everyone was.  I told him where to go, but he said that he just couldn't see it when he went there.  So I sighed, and I got my coat on and walked him there.

Upon arrival, I walked in and the atmosphere was overwhelming.  People were praying over each other and the spirit of God was certainly present.  There was something in me that told me to leave, that I did not belong here.  But I stayed.  And I was prayed for.  And then the speaker, a man named Craig Ginn, said this to me (he didn't have a background on me for the record):

"Right now the rainbows you're seeing are grey.

But soon, soon God will show you their color again".

For your information, they're colorful again.  I got off of my  depression meds a year and a few months ago.  But that's another story.