Nine.

True story.

I rushed home from spending time with Lowell's family in order to get back and go to my families Christmas eve service.   I throw on a new dress, which happens to be a wrap around kind of dress, and some nice dress pants underneath when i got home and book it to the service.

In there service, I am sitting in my chair.  We are asked to stand.

So I stand.

And... one of the ties of my dress is stuck in the chair and so unties the bow that holds the dress together.

Fortunately, I caught it in time to hand my candle to my mom and tie myself back together, and my parents church didn't have to have the most memorable Christmas eve service of their lives.  Yikes.

Merry Christmas everyone.

Let us all remember that this time is meant to remember the greatest gift of all, Jesus, Emmanuel - God with us.

Eight.

Christmas.

I recently wrote and organized a small short skit with the jr youth that went at the end of our church's children's christmas pageant.

I was supposed to write one about "Christmas from today's prespective".  It was kind of hard for me because I mostly wanted to start bashing consumer culture.  Then I remembered, that's not what I'm here to talk about and it's not appropriate for me to just bash things, things that I still struggle with.  Yikes Janessa.

So we put on a cute little drama that touched on how Jesus has been a bit removed from Christmas, and how he's really the "reason for the season".  I've been forcing myself to rethink this idea over and over, because I find myself straying into wanting things or feeling stressed out.  but what place does my stress and my selfishness have in a celebration of the ultimate gift that Jesus offered in himself when he came here?

refreshing.

On another note, Jess and mom and I went to Fargo from monday to wednesday.  It was just a really lovely time.  We ate out and enjoyed each others company, we shopped and laughed and watched the Mummy (as I snagged a trilogy box set.  probably the only person to buy it ever).

It was super fun.  I'd post pictures, but I seem to be having difficulties.  But the point is, it was awesome!  I like family!

Seven.

Surprise!  New hair day!

BEFORE:

(my hair looked kind of like this, except, in my mind i'd like to think i never looked like this.)

AFTER:

How exciting?  I like fun new hair!

Six.

Conversation with my mom today:

Me: Hey mom, was there any stew left over?

Mom: Yeah, but it's frozen.  I put it in the garage.

So I go and look around the garage, but don't see it on the table where our food goes to freeze, so I ask her where it is.

Mom:  It's on the wood pile behind the door! (Saying this in a bit of an impatient tone, one that says - clearly daughter, you should know where it is.  Are you blind?)

Me: Well sorry mom, I forgot to look in the most logical place of then all.

And then we both laughed.

Five.

in grade six i half jokingly, half seriously, asked a friend to get me a bird for my birthday.

when he got to my birthday party, he handed me a box with holes in it.

not thinking, i said thanks and just roughly put it down on the table.

he and my parents told me to look at the box again.

i realized what it was, and opened it up to fin

d the most beautiful blue budgie i'd ever seen inside. he was scared and small. his wings were short because they'd been clipped. he was mine.

i named him luke skywalker. that soon was shortened to sky.

nine years and a month later, brings us to last night.

when i came home from youth, checked on him and found him laying at the bottom of the cage.

i dropped my stuff and held him and cried so hard on the floor of our kitchen, jacket still on for a long time.

it's stupid to some because he's a bird.

but i used to study with him.

and he used to fly around the house and land on me.

he made such noise when i was watching a movie or on the phone and it was annoying at the time.

it wouldn't be annoying anymore.

Four.

there are days when all we must do is wake, before our body gives us signs that not all is right.

we hope, that in our waking, we will be able to forget the events of another day.

that sleep will be the ship that takes us to peace.

sleep is a fickle ship, if that is what she is.

she can bring us to peace, but she often will bring us to turmoil in our dreams to match that in our consciousness.