Fifty five.

This is my problem.

I rarely let God be "enough" for me.

I can say that he's my main man. My number one priority. My everything. And I can want so badly to mean it. Sometimes I really truly do.

Then it hits me: I'm a screw up. I can't keep to what I commit to.

It happens so fast too. I'll be walking along my path, trying to focus my eyes ahead, to fix them upon Jesus, and then bam. I trip. Or maybe it's not that I trip so much, as I look away and I loose my confidence. Like Peter on the water.

It's funny, because I am always critical of Peter when I read that story. Why didn't he just keep looking at Jesus? Seriously - he was WALKING ON WATER. Buddy, wouldn't the time to doubt doing it be before you got out of the boat and STEPPED onto the SEA?!?! Seriously? Seriously. But wait... it's exactly what I do too.

So what makes me look away? Why, when I know in my heart that all but He is temporary, will I choose to try it on my own?

You live, you learn.
Well I feel like I'm doing a lot of living, and not quite as much learning. I need to really understand that He is more than enough for me, and that when I am able to marvel in that fact, truly marvel in it, I will be able to figure out the rest.